I recently met a young man who introduced himself with the pronouns they/them. It challenged everything I may have learned in English class, so I apologize for modifying his (their) pronouns for the sake of literary clarity. It was difficult referring to him as “they”, but we are called to love and respect others; not to judge less we be judged. And no one wants that.
Perhaps he (they) found some identity in his (their) choice of pronouns; a part of who he is (they are?). This is not going to be easy.
Consider names rooted in tradition as in Arthur Pennington the Third, an “Arthur” in a long line of “Arthurs,” or Mr. O’Reilly meaning Son of Reilly. Titles, too, like General or Sergeant, are certainly earned.
My high school basketball coach had become a professor at my daughter’s university, and we met again at her orientation. He said I hadn’t changed, but there’s no doubt his vision had. I had a problem, though. My father, a PhD, taught us that if someone puts in the effort to achieve such a degree, we should address them as Doctor, so I didn’t know how to address him. He said, “Just call me Tom” … that I could not do. Doctor, professor, or coach was what he did, not who he was. It only became part of his identity out of my respect for him, or for how many times he yelled, “Get to the line!” (If you know, you know).
My name has no fancy prefix or suffix. I do share it with the second and sixth President, and my middle name is my grandmother’s maiden name so there is history. But do an internet search and hundreds of others will appear well before mine. Names, titles, and achievements may contribute to how others perceive us, but they do not define the core of who we are.
The Bible offers a powerful perspective on identity.
… God testified concerning him, “I have found David son of Jessie, a man after My own heart … Acts 13:22
Oh, to have such a heart that God Himself would consider me that way.
John the Baptist was a voice calling in the wilderness, “prepare the way for the Lord.” Isaiah 40:3
In John’s Gospel writings, John referred to himself as “the disciple Jesus loves.” Not apostle, nor Saint, nor me, myself or I, just the one Jesus loves. What greater identity could we claim than being known and loved by God?
Whatever we call ourselves may serve a purpose, but it is only temporary. What truly matters is who we really are … and Whose we are.
I pray I may reflect a man after God’s own heart, a voice crying in the desert to prepare the way, or simply one who Jesus loves, because I am. You are too.
If these words have been a blessing, pass them along to another who needs to hear.
And let me know what your think, in what way a story touched your heart. I value your thoughts.
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